Growth

I wanna cry when you touch me

Because I want you so badly

And if you asked for my heart
I'd give it to you gladly.

But its a luckless dream
Tied to a hopeless romance.



We bloomed together in this
Garden of lust we shared at night

Then felt like strangers in the
Uncloaked rawness of daylight.

Overtime vines of malice and
Weeds of waste become overgrown at a glance.



Were my affections subdued
While inside heavy hearted?

Were your displeasures shaken
To keep yours guarded ?

These far fetched feelings may have a foggy future
But tell me theres a chance.

Alone

A Hesitating Pulse

Quickened Breath Quiet

A Deliberate Step

With Meaningful Regret

Done

Take it all away

Cause I meant what I said

Every memory

We've shared in this bed

You know I meant it

When I said I was done

Crushed it to nothing

Like I was no one

You're cruel and you're blind

But you had no clue

That hearts could cry

And mine has for you

This knot in my chest

Was here all along

Tried to ignore it

you just don't belong

Confusion

Feeling Destructlively Discreet

Creates Chaotic Clutter

Imprisoned Empathy

Repeats Mindful Mutter

Secrets

Secrets of lust become our friends

And guard our minds from knowledge

Conterfeit emotions pretend

To cover and acknowledge

Condemnations

Lay down your weapons

And I'll lay down my words

Hand me forgiveness

And I'll hand you whats yours

Redemption is somethin' earned

Not handed over
Its a challenge to all

The progression is slower

A diamond encrusted throat

Which lacks the appeal

Of a truthful, honest mouth

You try to conceal

Your hateful stares

And hurtful eyes

Reveal no care

For speaking lies

Strive to prepare

For a war within.

The trials declared

Before it begins.

Stream...

Like an itch I cant stop scratching
You play over and over in my head
Where did you go last night
The moon always knows
Its watching you with eyes I cant see
But it never fades
How can you change so fast
Your mind doesn't have the power
My mom called yesterday
Asked about my life
What should I say to someone
Who really doesn't understand
Pretend, misinterpret, gloss over
Its always the same for us
You were the topic that as usual
She continued to miss
Stranger things have happened though...

I AM

I am not your sad story
I am not your claim to fame

I am not your one mistake
I am not taking the blame

I am not your big regret
I am not your shame to carry

I am not your misfortune
I am not your cemetery

I am my own sense of hope
I am my laughter's chime

I am my own dreamcatcher
I am taking my time

Untitled

Hands become preoccupied
Eyes looking self-satisfied
Mind caught in a riptide
Heart is over qualified
Want becoming dignified
Bodies lost in suicide

What Have You Done...

You feel hopeless and haunted
Is this what you wanted

The world is falling around you
And I don't know what to do

I cant hurt you or hate you
Is this what we've come to

Too many words left unsaid
Feel it with your eyes instead

If your soul seems to care
Why cant your heart get there

Whens the line gonna give
Whens it time for love to live

Gotta save myself from you
Before I've done what I cant undo

Broken record, Same old song
Jealousy lays where joy belongs

FUCK YOU in big words

This obliteration of association is a demonstration of imitation foundation.

My imperfections in the situation are nothing in comparison to your declaration and glorification of the inception of humiliation and scrutinization your "explanation" has caused.

Your condemnations and approximations to my calculations and interpretations have a flirtation of being an inspiration to the beautification of me.

The evaporation and disconnection of emotion and devotion have made the intoxication of rejuvenation a sensation to my disposition.

There will never be a duplication of question as to the condition of ruination you tried to commit.

My opposition to the composition of devastation your proclamation was, has made the complication of exhaustion a condition for intermission...

My heart is protected and disconnected from the obligation, obstruction and persecution of you.

This compilation of words is clarification of my resignation for caring about the situation when it comes to you.

When You Walked Away

What could I do

What could I say

To make you change your mind

To make you stay



Theres nothin I'd rather see

Than you standin next to me

Theres no place I'd rather be

Than next to you, Why cant you see



I can tell from the look in your eyes

That you're full of so many lies

But if forgiveness is what you need

Then tell me somthin that I can believe



You changed it all

When you walked away

We're not the people

We were yesterday

Hiding The Hurt

Looking in the mirror

Futures mixed with past

Memories of pain

Have a tendancy to last



Every happy feeling

Has an underlying pain

And once I think its left

the core of it still remains



Keep moving forward is the

Comment everyone makes

But empty feelings inside me

Are something my heart cant take



I've chosen to bury the hurt

Way down deep inside

But as hard as I try to bury

The harder it is to hide

Hush...

Little Baby

Listen to the words I say

Little Baby

Soon the hurt will go away



Until then hold your head high

Let the tears fall and dry

Oh little baby

Its gonna be okay

I promise it will someday



I wish I could take away the suffering

I wish I could take away everything

But I dont hold the magic

To take away pain that quick



Little Baby

Your heart will find someway

Little Baby

To move on and find your way

Craving A Dream

By: S.Cain

I crave the touch
You once gave to me
I want it as much
As eyes long to see

Stolen moments of time shared
For an instant it was there

My body was cold
You had a fever
Your hand was to hold
You made me a believer

In the warmth of your heart
From your touch at the start

Running up and down
Caressing my face
Eyes a hazel brown
Bodies layed in place

Reach in darkness to find
All thats been left behind

In time gone by
Remember the day
Beginning a sigh
Forgetting the way

You held me once all night long
My dream turned into a song...

Sleepless Nights

Got something I need to say
Need to get this off my chest
And After my souls conveyed
Then maybe my mind can rest

If I could go back in time
Who would I choose to blame
Its not a victimless crime
Because its what I became

Wasted Ink, Wasted Tears
Wasted Words, Wasted Fears
You know I'm always here
So Dont let me disappear

I picked up her shattered dreams
You destroyed with just one breath
I tried to sew back the seams
Of the life you put to death

I'm not broken anymore
I'm just a little battered
A feeling I cant ignore
As if it even mattered

Was It... Is It...

Was It...
Was it wrong for me to be your friend for so long in the hopes we could be more...
Was it wrong for me to like you for you but wish you could be what I wanted you to be...
Was it wrong for me to change myself into the idea of what I thought you wanted...
Was it wrong for me to be so angry with you for ignoring how much I enjoyed your company...
Was it wrong for me to hurt you to protect myself from letting you hurt me...
Is it wrong to want you back so much only after I've seen you wanted someone else...
Is it wrong for me to be sad for what I miss only after you say you want another...
Is it wrong for me to be so upset for losing something I created in a dream...
Is it wrong for me to hate myself only after working up the courage to speak to you and findng you gone...
Is it wrong for me to need you so bad only because I need someone...
Is it...

Ranting

By: S.Cain

Show me the way to the parade
Sticky eager faces
Turn at the corner here
And take a cab
To the fresh new fields
Green with envy
How do you do that
Why would you want to
After I'm done I'll have a drink
Something that burns
But tastes like grass
A long day ahead of me
But a shorter one behind me
Its time to take a nap
A soft damp pillow rests on my knee
Lay your hatred down on me
But mind the air
Its dense with something
A substance known as light

Digging

By: S.Cain

Truth, like diamonds are often
something buried & hard to find
Lies, however are most often glinting
on the surface of a mind

Its a struggle to dig through the dirt
of lies upon lies
But when you strike a diamond
its usually unrecognized

The beauty of that sparkle
is something everyone is attracted to
But when you've been in the dirt too long
sometimes the lies become true

Its up to you to determine
how hard you will work for the stones
And discover a mine in your mind
and a diamond of your very own

Box

By: S.Cain

If I put you in a box
Could I take you out and play

If I kept you in my room
Would you promise to always stay

If I gave you all of me
Could I know what you would say


If I held you together
Would you never run away

If I showed you the inside
Could I see yours someday

If I felt you in my dreams
Would you keep our demons at bay

If I let you fall down
Could I help you up halfway

If I took you with me now
Would you never go away

Open Your Eyes

Dedicated to a friend

By: S.Cain

The light shines through my window like it knows my secrets. Feathers of a whisper come scratching to the corners of my bed. Silent cries of want, born through desperation and raised within my thighs. Raping my own innocence away with every superficial caress and every stolen breath. I believe you will love my body tonight but never understand my mind so when darkness envelopes my room it shatters the reality I've made in my fantasy. I'll take whatever scraps are left behind because I know no other way to want and to be loved. My body is my temple but somehow i manage to destroy it brick by brick every night i share my walls with you. Damn you for not seeing this and damn me for allowing it.

Struggling Through The Strength

By: S.Cain

Moonlight washes away the day

Eyelids where your shadows rest

Never tired, never timid

The memories only conquest

Something oldened & forgotten

Sobs in the rhythm of your heart

The scar of a wound reopened

Which was never healed from the start

Live in the beauty of the night

And in the cloudless starry skies

Never tired, never timid

Of what the sun and moon denies

Light shines in the hint of your smile

And in the soft cheeks of your face

I look into your eyes blinded

By what can never be replaced

Behind Life's Debris

By: S.Cain

Just behind the sunset
My future waits for me
I haven't seen it yet
But its my destiny

Its where I'm full of pride
Its where I have to be
The wisdom coincides
With what I have to see

Just behind the sunset
The present slips from me
Appealing silhouette
Wind whispering softly

Its where children divide
Its where they give their plea
And the adult resides
To make the guarantee

Just behind the sunset
The past envelopes me
It is so delicate
Remember, holds the key

I have somewhat denied
The hurt endured by me
And taken all in stride
Everything that could be

Just behind the sunset
Time has entangled me
I will never regret
The pain i felt for thee

The emotions collide
Anger and honesty
Just like a rising tide
You roll in constantly

Just behind the sunset
A cloud of life's debris
I must never forget
The way we disagreed

Its on the other side
The cloud of life's debris
Where feelings cannot hide
The wound sustained by me

If Love Were A Prayer

By: S.Cain

The sweetest taste of rapture on your lips
The softest touch of gentleness on hips
Their bodies and mind in a partial eclipse
Unavailable to the futures script

Understand me
A soul let free
Don't have to be
Life's guarantee

His frame entangled in her perception
His reasoning to hold her attention
All thoughts held in a tasteful conception
To allow their bodies own ascension

Figures prepare
An evening shared
Hes unaware
Shes in a stare

Her intuition is locked in his view
Her uneasiness is swayed by his too
Their contemplation has become a clue
As to the belief of love overdue

Let someone in
Through the thick skin
And feel within
A needed sin

Their faith becomes a flirtation of lies
Their hope becomes a creation of tries
All in a world full of darkness in eyes
Abundant with the most silent of cries